027: You've Got a Friend in Me
Hello you,
There is such beauty behind quality time in the form of coffee dates or quick SunLife runs, that allow sweet acquaintances to become forever friends.
I reflect on the friendships I’m blessed with having, and I can’t help but be fascinated by the pivotal point when we as a duo break through the barrier of small talk and pleasantries, to explore the vast ocean of unconditional support that genuine friendships bring.
I just think that’s so cool. Like one moment you’re sitting there getting to know somebody, discussing commonalities vaguely and casually. And without realizing it all of a sudden you both take comfort in the breakdown of your outer shells, because you’ve just witnessed a connection that is deep and true and real.
Talk of your passions are exchanged, you feel solidarity in your fears, your sighs of relief are synchronized in discovering that someone else gets you.
I love the longevity of solid friendships, but I think my favorite part of these timeless connections is thinking back to those moments early on when you both open up for the first time.
The rarity teaches me to always appreciate, to never take for granted, to always remember the first set of hearty laughs shared when you realize you’ve got a friend in them, and it’s settled.
They’ve got a friend in you, too.
Sincerely, Lou
022: Shape-Shifting Sentiment
Hello you,
I’ve been feeling pretty nostalgic lately and I’ve noticed it comes in a plethora of shapes and sizes.
The biggest culprit as of late is the Facebook Memories On this Day setting. Although I’m a fan of looking back at photos that remind me of past events and experiences, it truly is a marvel to think about “wow, this is exactly where I was one, two, three, four years ago” (that is if you’re the kind of person who actually uploads photos on the day they’re taken, aka I would like to be you when I grow up). But it’s so fascinating to fathom where I’ve been, where I am today, and what I have to show for it.
Another shape I’ve seen nostalgia take on is a square - a cute little Chatbooks photo book. Every anniversary I create one of these books for the bf, and it’s filled with pictures we’ve taken over the course of the year. Looking through the book for our third year of dating, it was clear that Jan-July took up about 80% of the pages, and Aug-Dec (which is when he started working full-time and I started grad school) was quite lacking in photo evidence that we were actually a couple. It was a bittersweet realization, that it’s very clear we’re not in college anymore and don’t have the freedom to really adventure as often as we’d like, but it is nice to see that we can still take up even a few pages of photos during this new chapter of life.
And nostalgia has also come to me in the form of a voicemail from a dear friend all the way across the world, a text to make plans to FaceTime with a sister in Christ who is several timezones away, and scattered Instagram posts from a best friend who is living the dream in all corners of the globe. These appearances, brief and fleeting as they may come, still carry so much weight in reminding me how special these people are, and how my bonds with them will last a lifetime and thousands of miles in distance. Simply because our past left an imprint on our future, and while it’s silly and fun to reminisce on our memories together (back when we are all in the same hemisphere of the world), reveling in these sweet memories does bring a twinge of longing to relive them once again.
Nostalgia keeps me grounded. It holds my hand while I hesitantly walk toward new paths and life experiences, and reminds me that my memories will help make any unknown route into a home. It advises me that while I have sweet ties to the past, I can bring them along in my journey and my present-day welcomes them with a warm embrace. An embrace that says,
“Thank you for all you’ve done, you will never be forgotten.”
Sincerely, Lou
016: More Than Words
Hello you,
You are more than written words on a page; a sequence of keystrokes do not depict your whole story, your whole persona.
You are not confined to the repertoire of SAT words you’ve picked up over the years; your essence is not limited to a pithy response to the passerby inquiry of “how are you?”
You think your presence can be contained like a message-in-a-bottle, tossed out into the vastness of reality until some stranger somewhere happens upon it, with fingers crossed that it means something to them when they do.
Well I hope you know it does mean something, and that stranger is very thankful for you.
Your extraordinary, spectacular, elusive, fascinating, wondrous being, is appreciated.
Sincerely, Lou
015: What I'm Not
Hello you,
I’m sorry I’m not as strong as you think I am. I’m undeserving of the way your eyes glisten as you affirm my courage and boldness. At least I think they glisten, I can never quite tell from my peripheral view because I just can’t face to meet your gaze head-on.
I don’t know how to break it to you that I cannot be your stronghold, because I’m constantly fighting to even remain in my foothold.
I am not unbreakable, unwavering, untiring. The only thing complete about me is that I am completely the opposite of those things.
I am not donned with battle scars that signify my wins and resilience. They are scratches and wounds from my failures, the times I tripped while running away from the battle to begin with.
I’m sorry I can’t be your hero, your lowercase s savior.
But I do want to introduce you to the One who can be all of this and more for you. The One who will never falter or crumble or leave or disappoint. The One who can be your - and our - uppercase S Savior.
I’m still getting to know God too, but I do know that He wants to reveal Himself to me and you. And the good news is He doesn’t mind that we’re not as strong as we think we are.
Sincerely, Lou
014: Tables for Coffee
Hello you,
Most of my friend group have lived in “big kid” apartments for the last 2+ years now, so I’ve had the opportunity to visit and see how they decide to decorate this new chapter of their lives (literally). While the individual bedrooms (whether single or shared) and wall art are the typical culprits in giving away their sense of style, what I’ve found is that you can also tell a lot about a person based on their coffee table.
Is it an antiquey hand-me-down, a family heirloom passed down from generation to generation that just really clashes with the cabinets but Nana just wouldn’t take no for answer?
Is it sleek and modern with silver legs and contemporary finishings topped with a glass tabletop that is (or at least should be) Windex-ed every other day?
Is it a great reminder of how hours of bargain hunting and sifting through Craigslist ads finally paid off with a thrifty find that pleasantly ties the room together?
Is it a not-so-great reminder of how hours of deciphering Ikea instructions and trying to decide if you really need that extra screw/part/table leg eventually resulted in a flat surface that you can (hesitantly) put stuff on?
Is there even a coffee table to begin with?
No matter the situation, I’m a big fan of checking out the mixture of decorative and essential trinkets that live on each coffee table set up. In our living room for example, we’ve got the obligatory aesthetic of “coffee table reads” (i.e. cool books where it’s socially acceptable and encouraged to pick up only to flip through and look at the pictures), and a couple issues of Malibu magazine (see earlier i.e.). We also have a successful DIY project that turned a thrifted table tray into a trendy table accent, which is now an organized home to our collection of remotes, scented candles, and coasters. And below the surface of our coffee table, we have a “secret bottom layer” where we store our humble board game collection (which often goes neglected but that’s something we’re hoping to change with the addition of monthly game nights).
The point is, I see the coffee table as a little window into the daily life of the homeowner. It can be a place that matches with the rest of the furniture in the room, a comfortable spot to put your feet up and relax while binging on the latest Netflix marathon, a mini garden that displays a beautiful assortment of fresh picked flowers or bouquets from Trader Joe's, a surface that has maybe more marks from the lack of coaster usage as you’d like but it still adds character and is a sweet reminder of fun gatherings with friends.
Coffee tables are more than just an afterthought or a furnishing piece that everyone gets just because it’s what everyone does. (And I'm not just saying that because I would love for Pottery Barn to come across this, pick up on my obsession for living room decor, and hire me on the spot. Definitely didn't think of that at all.) Coffee tables really can make a house/condo/apartment a home, and I think there's something really special about that silent yet descriptive message from resident to guest.
So what’s your coffee table saying about you?
Sincerely, Lou
013: Sweet Dreams (are made of this)
Hello you,
Do you remember what you dreamt about when you were 2 years old? If I could guess it would probably be something related to whatever toy happened to make you squeal with joy, because playtime was never long enough.
Do you remember what you dreamt about when you were 12? Maybe subconsciously fantasizing about growing up and getting treated like the adult you thought you were acting like at the time.
Do you remember what you dreamt about when you were 22? Experiencing the cognitive dissonance associated with aspiring to be old enough where you finally knew what you were doing with your life, as well as yearning to be young again so you didn’t have to deal with it (that is if you ever did manage to sleep).
Dreams are funny. They can be extremely outlandish and the farthest from reality, while simultaneously uncovering the deepest darkest secret that could answer your question of “what do I really want?” No matter your age, no matter what you’re going through in life, dreams can be your escape. A string of sweet moments that allow you to do whatever you want whenever you want.
Dreams are dangerous. They can be your chance to flock to a safe haven in your mind, where everything goes your way and you never have to try. No matter your stage in life, what hardships and obstacles you’re facing, dreams can be your escape. A life raft allowing you to drift away from confrontations and to tell yourself it’s okay that you didn't accomplish what you thought you would, because in your dreams you have it all.
Do you remember what you dreamt about when you were 92? Perhaps it’s looking back on the incredible things you had in your extremely full life, wishing you could relive it all over again. Or wait were you just recalling some of your favorite dreams?
I don’t want to have that confusion when I’m 92. I want to know that I was brave enough to get out bed and face the day and everything that came with it, without the ability to wake up and realize it wasn’t real. I want my dreams to shed light on who I am, and then go be that person. I want to make my dreams a reality, not live my reality through a dream.
But that’s just me.
Sincerely, Lou
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